Truth Or Dare

Madonna's 1991 documentary of her Blonde Amibtion Tour is on VH1 Classic right now.

I don't want to say it's the highlight of my weekend because the steakburger I had at Morton's Friday night was damn good, but this could be the highlight of my weekend.

I've seen it no fewer than a few dozen times. Likely that number is much, much higher. But it's been at least 10 years since the last time and I'd forgotten how great it is. Madonna swinging that outrageous fake ponytail around, talking like a little girl one minute and then bossing everyone around the next. Love it.

She was about the age I am now when it was filmed and damn, I need to step up my game. Hit the gym. Take some dance classes. I could be looking a whole lot better.

My roommate Shane and our friend Adam used to watch Truth Or Dare constantly my senior year of college and we quoted it endlessly. It was impossible to have a conversation with us unless you had seen it several times because it was like we were speaking another language.

Madonna swaps Beauty for dancer 31 years younger.

Neat? Anyone who says my show is neat has to go.

I don't want to compromise my artistic integrity.

Do something else! Do my eyebrows or something!

Marty didn't come. Big deal.

He did it for all the wrong reasons. He doesn't want to heal himself.

And after seeing her uber-athletic stage show again, I realize how many of her moves I've stolen.

Thanks, Madonna. You're my lucky star!