Omg I am screwed. That's right party people, totally screwed. I've not run a step since November and guess what, the Pig is less than a month away. Holla!
I'm doing the relay again, and this year even more badly than in previous years. (Who knew that was even possible?! Oh wait, I did.) I've got four weeks to somehow increase my endurance, oxygen intake, prepare my legs, strategize how to fake like I'm actually running when I see the course photographers, etc etc. This could be my year to vomit at the switch point. Who wants to cook me up a plate of alfredo pre-run?
Do I have roof access from here? If I break something beforehand, that's a pretty good excuse, right? What about death? If I'm dead you guys can't really call me out on being out of shape and lazy, correct? Except I know you bastards and I know I could be laid up with my limbs hanging from chains in a hospital bed and you'd be all, 'Way to break your legs just to not embarrass yourself at the relay Daugherty.'
God I hate you guys.
Anyway... We are called Kathleen Turner Overdrive. Look for us to finish last. Ow ow!
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